Sunday, February 12, 2006

I am disappointed

Today was a sad day. I was relaxing in the kitchen and awoke to the negativity of the lady who takes care of me and her friend. Fueled by booze, they were looking at magazines and yelling about celebrities -- who was on drugs, who'd become stout, who was a cult member, that sort of talk! Unhealthy behavior! I'm pretty sure neither of them are personally acquainted with Tomkat and these other magazine people. I looked for myself and unless she has paid a visit while I was resting, Paris Hilton has not been to the house I live in! I tried to pull their attention away by making it clear I was ready for some liver snacks. But they just went on in their world talking and even shouting about not-real magazine people and ignoring the real me, Wolfie! Not caring!
Finally, the lady who takes care of me and her friend were distracted by visitors, so I put those scandal sheets to their proper use by chewing them. Ruining!

Take it from me, Wolfie: "It's easy to stay serene. Just turn something bad for the mind into something good for the gums!"

Friday, February 10, 2006

Old age is not for sissies!

Dear Wolfie, I just heard the expression "old age is not for sissies." I'm confused. Am I in for a surprise when I get old? I'm 22 now and want to be prepared, but I think I'm kind of a sissy so...Help prepare me, Wolfie!
Young and scared, Hollywood

Dear Young and Scared,
Let me list my age-related issues: dry, flakey skin, flyaway hairs, cracked pads, cataracts, gnarled claws, very few teeth (and those I have are worn down to nubs!), a trick hip...And that's just the beginning. You will need to eat soft food and make sure your caretaker gives you adequate senior care. The good news is that even though your physical self goes into decline, you will, with attention and meditation, become wise and mentally strong like me, Wolfie!
Have fun getting older! Namaste!

Saturday, February 04, 2006

Trying to locate a bridge between cultures

Many write to me and ask how I stay so serene. Believe me, it's not easy these days! As you may know, I live in a multi-species home. And Ringo and Lucy are really testing my patience. They steal my kibble, and as you can see, pull at the blanket in my sleeping basket. They are ruining the handiwork! I try to be understanding, but their energy is causing much mayhem.

Take it from me, Wolfie: "Don't ruin others' lives with your craziness. You'll thank yourself later!"